I do not know who this guy Avtar Misri is but what I do know is that I admire him for his clarity of thought and courage to speak what must be spoken and followed. Here is what he writes on this subject in a discussion baord,
— In kashmiripandit@yahoogroups.co.in, avtar misri <akmisri@…> wrote:
Dear Razdan Sahb,
Namaskar. You are right.
Why 4 days or 12 days (as observed by most KPs) and why not 1 day or 5 days. There must have been some Rishi Munis who went into the mountains and returned with knowledge. But that was an era when time was not counted in minutes and hours but by part of the day such as morning, afternoon evening and night with endless flexibility.
My little knowledge of 13 days comes from the 2 books i have read. > A book by T. Lobsang Rampa (don’t remember the title) and another by Sogyal Rinpoche titled “The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying”. > In both books emphasis is on 13 days. > > In the first book when a person dies and the Soul leaves the body, Angels come to accompany him to the other world but do take him immediately. The soul hovers over the body wondering why is the body which he loves, still, and why am i out. Then the body is washed and anointed and cremated or buried. The soul does not accompany the body but remains in the house as it is attached to the surrounding and the people who he sees crying and mourning. Slowly over the next days scene changes. There are fewer people crying and mourning, most are back to their daily chores and meet only at designated times etc. Then on the 13th day each one is back to business of wining and dining. the dead is almost forgotten and hardly remembered. This is when the Angels show him the reality and the soul realising it allows the Angels to take him away. > > In the other book Rinpoche says the soul take 13 days to go away and suggests that the body should be kept for all the 13 days. Before writing the book he had settled at Paris so as a concession considering the climate he suggests at least keep the body for 3 days before cremation or burial. > > About the 4th day ceremonies all i know is that the Sindhis observe “The Chautha”. My Mother must have been influenced by Sindhi Refugee neighbours of ours for 16 years. My Mother wrote the letter in December of 1999 shortly after our Father’s demise. She must have seen and read the Writing on the Wall. > > A few years back a Senior KP a great Teacher and a revered one (some of you surely were his students) wrote a letter much before his demise to his sons with c.c. to his Brothers and Sisters children where in he left instruction not to perform 10th 11th and 12th day. Instead give the Money to some Charity.
2 years back another senior KP died not only of old age, also from some illness towards the end. 15 days before his death the Son, D-in-law and grand kids had come on a vacation from the US and been with him. When he died the Son could not come and rites were performed by his Son-in-Law. The Ashes were kept at the Cremation ground for months till the Son arrived and immersed the Ashes at Nasik. >
Will some explain to me why the Ashes cannot be kept at home. Is this how we respect the dead by leaving the Ashes at the Crematorium.
Razdan Sahb these are not isolated cases but a sample. Recently you attended a funeral at Pune where you were such a great help in making all funeral arrangements. Do we have any at Mumbai. Just a few weeks back i attended a funeral where utter confusion was order of the day. Pity us KPs.
Change is a must and I pity those who resist the change.
It reminds me of: “A man is like a goat tied to a pole. There is a radius of freedom, but the circumstances of our action is set”.
About better use of the body one needs courage and i am looking forward to the day when i would visit J. J. Hospital and donate my body and I will not be the first. Shri Somnath Jhala of Mumbai has done it years back. I know him since 1954 and he is a relative. I pray for him as he is suffering from Cancer and suffers severe pain.
Warm Regards,
Avtar K. Misri
Unquote
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Thanks Avtar,
